Wednesday, November 16, 2005

 

"Remember When" July through November 2005

Nov 16 2005, 08:37 PM
Hey Screech, remember the Thanksgiving episode? Remember how your mom packed her bags and flew to Graceland without you the day before Thanksgiving? Remember how lonely you were for family? Remember when you went to school and told everyone there about how your mom ditched you? Remember when you started crying? Remember when Mr. Belding over heard you and said, “There there Screech, you can come to my house for Thanksgiving?” Remember when Belding said it’d be really fun because Zack and Slater would be there too? Remember when on Thanksgiving night you showed up to Mr. Belding’s apartment? Remember when Belding answered the door and said “gobble gobble, come inside!?” Remember when you followed him into the dining room? Remember when you were looking at the pictures on the wall on the way to the dining room? Remember how most of them were just frames with the store display image on them? Remember how the only picture frames with something in them was Mr. Belding wearing a dog collar that said “Adolf” on it next to a bald blind man? Remember how you didn’t understand that photo until one fateful night at the radio station? Remember how the other frame had Belding’s criminal record in it? Remember when you stopped to look at it Belding rushed you off and the only word you really saw was “statutory?” Remember when Mr. B sat you at the table with Zack and Slater? Remember how you greeted them? Remember when you all sat down and you asked what was for dinner? Remember when Slater said he’s making Mexican food but it’s not ready yet? Remember when you asked Zack and Slater why they weren’t with their parents? Remember when they both said in unison “our parents are neglectful assholes?” Remember when you asked Belding where Mrs. B was? Remember when he just nonchalantly said “I made her up.” Remember when Slater announced he was gonna check on the feast? Remember when he went into the kitchen and was in there for about 10 minutes before coming out with a silver platter with a lid on it? Remember when he put it in front of you and lifted the lid? Remember how it was a huge smelly meaty turd and a sprig of parsley on the side? Remember when you gagged and said “hey guys, what’s going on?!?” Remember how they all laughed and laughed? Remember how they all stood up and unbuttoned their pants still laughing? Remember how confused you were? Remember when Zack took the platter and cracked you across your huge conk? Remember when you hit the floor in a daze? Remember when Mr. Belding stuffed your rectum with his unlubed middle aged cock? Remember how he kept screwing your asshole violently? Remember how you screamed with the might of the lord hoping that someone in the other apartment would hear you? Remember when Zack stuck his prick in your mouth to muffle your screams and Belding and Zack spit-roasted you? Remember when Slater flipped you on your side and him and Belding double teamed your bleeding torn asshole? Remember how they kept violating you whilst punching you in the kidneys? Remember when they all pulled out and Slater gave you the tea bagging of the century while Belding gave you a wicked pair of Arabian goggles? Remember when Zack stuffed a fist full of parsley up your ass and kept punching your innards with his fist in your ass? Remember he also stuffed your ass with bread? Remember when Belding said “how ‘bout some cranberry sauce you stupid cocksucker!!!!?” Remember when he shot liquid shit all over your face? Remember when Slater said “yeah, how ‘bout some apple cider to wash it down with” and he pissed all over you? Remember how the all screamed “NOW FOR THE BASTING” and they blew their salty loads all over your naked bleeding body? Remember when they kicked you in the gut repeatedly and then left the apartment to scope out some real man meat? Remember when you heard the door open and Tuttle came in and said “I live next door and I heard the whole thing!!?” Remember how happy you were that help came? Remember when your relief turned to horror as Tuttle kicked you square in the zoinker and yelled “YOUR VERSION OF THE SCHOOL SONG SUCKS!!!” then kicked you in the zoinker again and then left the apartment? Remember how thankful you were that you survived the night? Man, the Bayside gang sure showed you the meaning of Thanksgiving!!!

Nov 6 2005, 07:03 PM
Hey Diamond, remember when you were on the set of Saved by the Bell and Bob Saget came by to visit the set? Remember how excited you were because you were a huge Full House fan and you were totally gay for all the males in the Tanner family including Comet the dog? Remember when Dennis Haskins gave Bob Saget a friendly hug and introduced you to him? Remember when Dennis said that him and Saget were in acting school together and were really close friends? Remember when Mario Lopez came up behind you and shouted “HEY BOB, I’M YOUR BIGGEST FAN!!?” Remember how enraged with jealousy you got? Remember when, without even thinking of the consequences, you told Mario to back off and you called him a stupid spic? Remember when Dennis said his characters catch phrase: “hey hey hey, what is going on here?!!?” Remember when you explained your homosexual feelings towards Bob to them? Remember when Bob chuckled and said “its okay Dustin, I’m really gay too and I’d like it if I could hang out with you in your dressing room after the shoot!” Remember when, in disbelief, you said “really?” Remember when Bob replied “sure thing, it’ll be a blast, I promise!” Remember when you finished shooting your scene and you went back into your dressing room to meet with Bob? Remember when you lights were out and you fumbled for the switch? Remember when somebody from behind you shoved you into your dressing room and on to the floor? Remember when the lights came on and Bob Saget was standing over you stroking his shlong? Remember when you said “oh boy, I guess today’s my lucky day!?” Remember when you turned around to see who pushed you and you saw Mario and Dennis completely naked with huge hardons? Remember when Dennis said “tough break kid!” Remember when Mario said “yeah dick cheese, we’re gonna turn your ass into a wizards sleave!!!?” Remember when you got kinda scared because you could tell they were out for blood? Remember when Mario pounced on you and started to ram your ass screaming “TAKE IT, TAKE IT, TAKE IT, TAKE IT YOU FUCKING ZUBAZ WEARING JEWISH FAGGOT!!!!!?” Remember when Bob Saget stuck his cock in your mouth causing you to choke and throw up all over his prick? Remember how it felt to have Mario and Bob Saget spit-roasting you? Remember how Bob sounded moaning and groaning with pleasure as you screamed and writhed in shear pain? Remember when Dennis gave you a golden shower whilst laughing in his trademark laugh? Remember when Jack “Tuttle” Angeles burst into the room with the camera and sound crew shouting “THERE THEY ARE, GET THIS ON FILM!!!” Remember how the cast and crew that you worked with for years and your favorite actor violated you and made you feel like trash? Remember when Jack took off his pants and him and Dennis bent over and sprayed shit all over you, Mario and Bob? Remember when Bob pulled out and scooped up your vomit from the floor and wiped it in your eyes? Remember how you screamed in pain? Remember when all four of your assailants shoved their dongs in your mouth and all unloaded their taint in your? Remember when Jack said “thank you come again” in an Indian accent and kicked you square in the zoinker? Remember when the cast and crew all left laughing their asses off? Remember how you got herpes, crabs, and full blown AIDS from your attackers? Remember when they used the footage of the rape in the Full House/Saved by the Bell crossover episode that they filmed a few weeks later? Man, they sure captured drama in that shoot!!

Oct 23 2005, 11:16 AM
Hey Screech, remember that episode where you were at the mall with Mr. Belding and Slater? Remember when you three were in line at Orange Julius? Remember when you were first in line and Mr. Belding pushed you on the ground and said “get the hell outta my way FAGGOT!!?” Remember when you heard a chuckling in the background? Remember when you were visibly pissed at Mr. B? Remember when Slater saw this and said “yeah, do what you’re told you Zubaz wearing COCKSUCKER!!” and faked you out like he was gonna slug you and you cowered from him? Remember when you heard more laughter? Remember when Slater slapped you and you started to cry? Remember when the laughing man came up to you and said “I like your style kid! You should be an actor?” Remember when the laughing man said he was a talent agent and he wanted you to get into the acting “biz?” Remember when he told you to bone up on your acting skills? Remember when you went to James the actor for some training? Remember when James the actor said that you have perfect comedy timing but you’d never get a job in a horror film because your screams of horror were terrible? Remember when you asked if there is anything you could do? Remember when he said “of course, you’re a quick learner?” Remember when he stood up on his desk and told you to hold still? Remember how confused you were? Remember when James the actor screamed “BANZAI!!” and did a leg drop on you? Remember when started to crawl to the door? Remember when James the actor crawled on top of you and pulled you away from the door? Remember how you screamed with horror? Remember how you kept clawing and clawing and eventually ripped some of your finger nails off? Remember when James the actor ripped off your Zubaz and stuck three fingers in your ass? Remember when you screamed in horror again? Remember when he ripped off his pants and anally violated your against your will? Remember how it felt to have his unlubbed cock tearing you up insides? Remember how you just kept screaming and screaming as he pummeled your ass? Remember when Belding and Slater and the “talent agent” walked into the room with a video camera stroking their schlongs? Remember when your relief of seeing familiar faces turned to extreme horror so quickly that it’s not even worth mentioning but I really like the phrase “your relief turned to horror?” Remember when you screamed “WHAT KIND OF MOVIE IS THIS?!?!?!” Remember when the “talent agent” said “IT’S A JERK FILM SHIT STAIN!!” Remember when the “talent agent” pulled off his fake moustache and you noticed it was Zack’s dad? Remember when Belding, Slater, and Zack’s dad stuck their cocks in your mouth and shot their loads in your mouth? Remember your muffled gurgling screams as they did this? Remember when James the actor just kept ramming your ass? Remember when he came in your ass giving you herpes? Remember when as he came he started to choke you out with a bowling trophy? Remember when Slater took a huge runny shit on the rug and then Belding wrapped you up in the shit covered rug? Remember when all four of them then carried you to the Max and screamed “HEY EVERYONE, SCREECH THINKS HE SHOULD BE ON THE RED CARPET!!” and the unraveled the rug? Remember how you limp shit covered body flopped on the floor and everyone was laughing at you? The gang sure taught you to stay away from Hollywood!!

Oct 10 2005, 02:15 PM
Hey Screech, remember when you entered the Miss Bayside pageant? Remember when, in self doubt, you told Zack that you couldn’t enter because you were a guy? Remember when Zack said he’d back you and you’d win? Remember when you didn’t believe him? Remember when you and Zack went to Belding’s office to sign up for the pageant? Remember when Belding said “Screech you’re a man, you can’t enter?” Remember when you sighed and Zack kept pestering Belding into signing you up? Remember Jesse burst into his office screaming about her feminism bullshit? Remember how Jesse was visibly undergoing hormone therapy at the moment? Remember how her screaming sounded like a rock in a blender because of her hormone treatments? Remember when Belding said “I guess he can enter” so that Jesse would leave? Remember when after Jesse left Belding pulled Zack aside and whispered something in his ear? Remember when Zack nodded his head and gave Belding the OK sign? Remember Belding said, “Screech, my boy, c’mon over here and let me explain the rules?” Remember when you walked over to him? Remember when you got a whiff of his cologne? Remember how it turned you on but you hide it from them? Remember when you knelt by his desk to look at the rules sheet? Remember when Belding stood up and said “The school board, of course, doesn’t charge an entrance fee for contestants. But because I’m bending the rules a bit for you I’m gonna have to charge you an entrance fee?” Remember when you said “well how much?!?” Remember when Belding winked at Zack and he got you into a wicked full nelson? Remember when Belding dropped his pants and jammed his wrinkled middle aged cock into your mouth? Remember when you eagerly accepted it and started to tongue bathe his Willy Wonka? Remember when Zack noticed your lack of struggle and let you out of the head lock? Remember when you went hog wild on Belding’s prick? Remember when you started to fondle his balls and his anus? Remember when Belding said “Oh god, Screech please don’t stop! This is more than you’re required!!?” Remember when he finally blew his load in your mouth and you gulped down his taint in a second? Remember when Belding lit a cigarette and sat back and drank a scotch on the rocks? Remember when in a cool calm voice he said “go ahead Screech, the stage is all yours?” Remember when you and Zack went into the bathroom to talk about what just happened and how you were so excited? Remember when Slater was secretly listening in to your conversation while standing on a toilet so he can hear the other guys fart and poop? Remember when Slater heard what went on and decided he was gonna get even and enter the contest himself? Remember when Slater approached you telling you that he has a beauty cream for your face to make it extra beautiful? Remember when you said “where is it?” Remember when Slater led you to the boiler room and then cracked you in the skull with a monkey wrench that he had stashed the night before? Remember when you hit the floor and Slater screamed “HERES THE CREAM YOU FAGGOT!!” and he dropped his pants? Remember when he threw you around like a rag doll fucking all your holes? Remember when after 15 minutes of hardcore ass rape Jesse burst into the room? Remember how she was all emotional because the doctors were toying with her hormones? Remember when she got pissed and kicked you in the face causing your black eye? Remember when Slater got so excited about your injury he came instantly? Remember when Slater left the room to wash up and Jesse looked at your bruised body and shouted “YOU FUCKING FAGGOT!! YOU’RE TRYING TO RUIN THE INTEGRITY OF THE PAGAENT!!” and she gave you a nice shit spray and left the room? Remember when you held your naked broken body thinking “boy, with all this gay sex I sure feel like a champ!?” Remember when with all your beaming confidence you won the competition in a landslide victory? Remember when Belding pulled you backstage and said “here’s your prize…” and fucked you hard? Remember when you came and screamed “ZOOOIIINNNKSS!!!?” Remember when that was the greatest day of your life? Boy you sure were all smiles that day!!!

Oct 9 2005, 07:44 PM
Hey Dustin, remember when you were in DD and the Dicksmokers? Remember when you guys broke up briefly to clean up your drug addictions? Remember how the break up also kept your antics off of the news and allowed you to keep your job at NBC? Remember when you were contacted by Stinky Pete, your guitarist, for a reunion show? Remember when you played your reunion show at the Roxy on Sunset Blvd on January 1st 1992? Remember when your legion of queercore fans showed up? Remember when the opening bands (the Finger Fuck Franchise, Twisty Straw Catheter, and King Cricket) played the stage while you and the band prepped backstage? Remember how your “prepping” involved stripping naked and covering yourselves in Vaseline while wrestling on a tarp? Remember when you and the band members formed a train and fucked the living shit out of each other 3 times before the bands were finished? Remember when your roadie would then give you cocaine enemas? Remember when after all your “prepping” you got into costume and waited for King Cricket to finish up? Remember when the band finished and your roadies set up all your equipment? Remember when you guys waited backstage to build anticipation? Remember when the crowd started to scream and shout for your band? Remember when the crowd started to chant “ZOINKS ZOINKS ZOINKS” ad infinitum? Remember when after about 20 minutes of waiting time you had the lighting guy cut the lights? Remember when the crowd went insane and started to strip naked? Remember when in the cover of the darkness you and the band hurried to the stage? Remember when Stinky Pete strummed a chord and let the feedback kick in? Remember when the crowd in berserk and started to buttslam each other? Remember when you shouted “ALL RIGHT YOU FUCKING MELLON HEADS!!!” and instantly kicked into your song “Barnyard Gangbang?” Remember when the moshpit of buttsex and drug abuse kicked in to full gear as you screamed the lyrics and jerked off into your hand? Remember when the song ended and you threw your seed into the audience? Remember when after a few more songs you bent over and shat out your cocaine enema into the crowd? Remember how at this point in the show the entire audience was covered in shit, piss, semen, and blood? Remember when you and Patient X, your drum tech, started to 69 each other on stage as the band cranked out an instrumental version of your song “Father, Please Finger Me Tonight?” Remember when the song ended and you and the rest of the Dicksmokers said “GOODNITE!” and left the stage and the lights cut out again? Remember when everyone in the audience knew there was an encore coming up and started to shout “ZOINKS!” again? Remember when you guys came back on stage and went into a rectal ripping version of “Rim Goblin?” Remember when the crowd went into an unstoppable frenzy of debauchery? Remember when the band finished the set and destroyed your equipment and the stage? Remember when the entire band formed the train like you did backstage and invited people from the crowd to join? Remember when the band and the crowd went at it for about 2 hours and then you finally left? Remember when your crew distributed flyers for a dumpster party behind the Denny’s on Sunset? Remember when you and the crowd showed up to the party and Dennis Haskins was there waiting for you guys with a bunch of other queers? Remember when you and the crowd started doing your deed until 5am? Boy that was one helluva show!!!

Oct 3 2005, 02:42 AM
Hey Screech, Remember the pilot episode of "Screech on Life?" Remember how it was a shortlived tv show about you after college but before you became the assistant principal as Bayside? Remember how it tanked because everyone hates you anyways? Remember how the show chronicled you and your best friend Timothy Reynolds because you had ditched the rest of the gang because it finally dawned on you as to why your rectum is like a wizards sleeve? Remember how the pilot was about you and Timothy going to the mall for some snazzy business clothing so you two could get a job? Remember when you and your good buddy Timothy were walking through the parking lot to the Palisades mall? Remember when you saw a bum on the side on the building asking for change? Remember when Timothy made the comment that he was a useless bum that doesn't deserve any change? Remember when you agreed with him remembering back to the bum that you helped on Christmas a few years back? Remember how you hated that bum during Christmas but were forced to "care" because Zack was trying to get some pelt from the bums daughter? Remember how you hated that bum a few years back? Remember how you hated every bum in the world because you thought of them as being a drain on society? Remember when the bum asked you and Timothy for some change and you said "eat my ass you fucking loser?" Remember when the bum jumped up and screamed "I KNOW WHO YOU ARE YOU FUCKING CUNT FACED PERIOD STAIN!!!!!" Remember when you jumped at this outburst and you realized it was a coked out Brian Fate? Remember when you saw the look in his eye and you got scared because you were a little bit too familiar with that look? Remember when you hurried Timothy and yourself into the mall? Remember when Brian Fate grabbed you collar and shouted "NOT SO FAST YOU BITCH!!!?" Remember when all those years of rape and violation hit you all at once and you started to go into a severe crippling panic attack? Remember when Brian Fate took advantage of this situation and through you on the ground and rammed his rammer hammer in your shitslide? Remember when you heard a voice shout "Screech get up! Run away!" Remember when you clawed your way out of the situation and ran to Timothy's arms crying? Remember when Timothy said "I'm sorry but its just to fucking hot?" Remember when you were confused and then he slugged you right in the gut? Remember when Timothy and Brian Fate started to kick and stomp your body until you went limp? Remember when Timother gave you a pair of Arabian goggles and took a nice meaty dump on your mouth? Remember when Brian Fate threw your legs over his shoulders and started to pound your ass? Remember when Timothy started to slam you toothless shitcovered mouth? Remember how everyone at the mall crowded around you guys and cheered them on like a fight on the playground? Remember when they finally came in you and then gave you a nice golden shower? Remember when the put their clothes on and left you there? Remember when Slater ran out of the crowd and put you in one of his signature moves? Remember when Slater started to ass slam you? Remember when he finally came and gave you a nice shit spray? Remember how the crowd just kept laughing and cheering? Remember when Slater finished and the crowd disperced? Remember the show got axed because it was nothing but a rehash of Saved by the Bell but with different characters? Man I can't wait for that to come out on DVD!!

Sep 30 2005, 08:41 PM
Hey Screech, remember the episode where you won George Michael tickets? Remember when you skipped your biology class to win those tickets? Remember how you had to show up at the radio station at 1 o’clock dressed as television’s Webster? Remember how once you showed up and there were a ton of Websters there? Remember when Ken Kelly came outside and started handing out raffle tickets? Remember when you number was drawn and you jumped up and down and hugged Ken Kelly? Remember when you got the tickets and raced home? Remember when you got home and thought about who you were gonna take to the concert? Remember how you wanted to take Slater and Zack because you had an intense crush on them? Remember when you quickly erased that memory from your head because “that’s what guy’s aren’t supposed to think about?” Remember when you went for your usual cover up and asked Lisa to come along? Remember when Lisa agreed to come with because she a gold digging like bitch? Remember when you and your mom went and picked her up and dropped you off at the George Michael concert? Remember how it was general admission and you got to be surrounded by gay men? Remember when you finally realized that you are truly gay and there’s nothing you can do about it? Remember how the constant grinding and rubbing of all the gay men made you spike and boner? Remember when you groin started to ache because of the constant throbbing of your tiny cock? Remember when you raced to the bathroom to crack on off? Remember when you walked into the bathroom there were ten guys fucking and sucking in the stales and on the floor? Remember how excited you got and you felt your precum dribble down your zoinker? Remember when you saw Belding sitting on a sink getting head whilst smoking a cigarette? Remember when you realized this is the life for you? Remember when you quickly ripped off your zubaz and grabbed your ankles? Remember when Belding said “SAMUEL POWERS!?! IS THAT YOU?!?!” Remember when you lustfully replied “yes sir it is!!!” Remember when Belding kicked you square in the zoinker? Remember when he started to slam your ass? Remember how you kept screaming “ZOINKS!!!” Remember how the whole time Belding rammed you he kept saying “you better not fucking tell anyone you little faggot…” Remember when you finally came the biggest load you ever had and screamed with the might of the lord “ZOOOIIINNNKKSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” and you collapsed like a rag doll? Remember when Tuttle and Milo walked into the bathroom in short shorts holding hands? Remember when they saw you on the floor quivering in ecstasy? Remember when they came over to you and sprayed their shit all over your body? Remember when another homo came over and gave Belding a bump of meth? Remember when he farted in your face and said “savor the flavor faggot!” Remember when you held yourself in delight knowing that you finally found your place in the world? Boy its sure great to know your roots!

Sep 28 2005, 08:26 PM
Hey Screech, remember the Halloween episode? Remember how excited you were because it’s your favourite holiday of the year? Remember how you loved dressing up for Halloween because you get to finally be somebody other than yourself? Remember going out and shopping for a pretty bitchin costume? Remember how your costume was a werewolf? Remember how lifelike and realistic you costume was? Remember how you spent an enormous amount of money on it that you stole from your mom’s purse in small increments? Remember when you got up extra early to put your costume on? Remember when you got to school and nobody recognized you? Remember when you walked around the school picking on your nerd brethren because they didn’t know it was you? Remember how you started causing trouble because nobody knew it was the loser Screech under your costume? Remember when you saw Slater was dressed as Mr. Universe? Remember when you saw Zack dressed as a lifeguard? Remember the boner you sported because of their extremely gay costumes? Remember how you started to grind on them? Remember how you thought that you just couldn’t contain your pulsating erection and you dripping quivering leather starfish? Remember when you got the idea to do “stuff” to yourself being that nobody will know it’s you? Remember when you rammed a dildo up your ass underneath the costume? Remember when you when you stole a tube of Orajel from the school nurse? Remember when you squeezed the tube in your ass? Remember how the numbness made you pitch an incredible tent? Remember when you consistent grinding caused Zack to slug you in the gut? Remember when you got some balls and kicked both Slater and Zack in the testicles? Remember when Tuttle, who was dressed as the Stay Puft Marshmallow man, saw you do this and took you and the boys to Mr. Belding’s office? Remember how excited you were to be in a small room with those studs? Remember when you thought things just couldn’t get any better Mr. Belding walked into his office in a leather biker hat, a leather biker vest, and only a pair of assless chaps? Remember how nobody knew it was you and they kept questioning you on your name? Remember how irate Belding got and screamed, “TELL ME YOUR FUCKING NAME YOU GODDAMN FAGGOT!!!” Remember when you jumped and his outburst and your Orajel-ed numb poopchute just spewed out a quart of liquid shit? Remember how Mr. B’s office quickly filled up with the stench of your shit? Remember when Tuttle said, “This shit smell’s very familiar…?” Remember when Belding and Slater nodded their head’s in agreement? Remember when you started to get nervous about your identity being compromised? Remember when Zack snapped his fingers and said, “ITS THAT FAGGOT SCREECH!! GET HIM!!” Remember when Tuttle got you in a full nelson? Remember when Zack cracked you in the face again causing your mask to fall off? Remember when Slater pulled off his speedo and Zack pulled down his swimming trunks? Remember Zack used Belding’s scissors to cut your suit off? Remember when Zack and Slater started to double team your ass? Remember how it felt to have Zack and Slater’s cock in you tearing you up? Remember how frightened you felt knowing that you couldn’t feel the damage being done because of the numbing effects of the Orajel? Remember when after 15 minutes Belding said, “Okay boy’s, I think he’s had enough…” Remember when you thought that it was all over and you sighed? Remember when your relief turned to horror when Mr. Belding grabbed his “Principal of the Year” award and clocked you in the head with it? Remember when you collapsed to the floor and Tuttle and Belding started to spit-roast you? Remember when you heard Belding say, “boy’s, go to the cafeteria and prepare a Texas chili bowl!!” Remember when Zack and Slater said in unison “You got it Mr. B!” and the raced out the door? Remember when Belding and Tuttle flipped you over and Tuttle sat on your faced and planted a nice juicy fart? Remember when Belding started to piss all over you? Remember when Tuttle ran out of fart and started to spray fart on your face? Remember when Zack and Slater came bursting into the office with some Tabasco sauce and a funnel? Remember when Zack flipped you over and stuffed your mouth with his cock? Remember when Slater gave you the Texas chili bowl as mentioned by Belding? Remember when Slater started to give you a Polish bike ride? Remember when Tuttle kicked you in the gut and you collapsed? Remember when Belding said, “Well, we tricked him! Now it’s time for the treat!” Remember when they all bent over and sprayed you with a tidal wave of diarrhea? Remember when they all kneeled by your face and came their disease tainted sperm into your mouth? Remember when they stuffed your limp body back into your costume? Remember when they propped you in the hallway and all the kids thought your limp unconscious body was a Halloween decoration? Remember how the kids would come by and hit you and set some of your fur on fire? Boy, they sure tricked and treated you!!

Sep 11 2005, 02:00 AM
Hey Dustin, remember when you got a letter in the mail requesting that you show up for a Saved by the Bell convention? Remember how the letter promissed a great reward for showing for the convention? Remember how excited you where that there were still enough SBTB fans to necessitate an entire convention in your honor? Remember when you booked your flight and packed your bags? Remember how excited you were to be traveling to an SBTB convention? Remember your joy when the time of the flight came? Remember how happy you were to have a window seat? Remember how you saved your airline peanuts because your so poor from not having any work that peanuts were a luxury to you? Remember when your flight landed and you skidaddled to the convention? Remember when you got to the venue and there was a note on the door that said "SBTB-CON ENTRANCE IN BACK --->?" Remember when you walked down the alley to the back and you saw Me, Kurt Steinberg, Maxwell Nerdstrom, Gay Zack, Rocco and Kevin Bacon holding a video camera? Remember when you realized you made a terrible and irriversable career move? Remember when you turned around to walk away and you bumped into Ed Alonzo? Remember when Ed saw the fright in your eyes and comforted you by saying "Its okay Dustin, I got the letter too!" Remember how your relief turned to horror when you saw his face contort into a vicious baleful expression? Remember when Ed caught you in the jaw with a wicked left hook? Remember when you hit the pavement and Rocco quickly got to work teabagging you while Ed aggressivly chewed on your nutsack? Remember when Fagbusters showed up out of nowhere and stabbed and killed Kevin Bacon and stole his camera? Remember when Rocco and I started spit-roasting you while Kurt Steinberg gave you the golden shower of the century? Remember when Rocco and I finally blew our loads in you? Remember when Maxwell and Kurt screamed "MY TURN TO FUCK THIS USELESS PIECE OF MAN FLESH!!" and "PUCKERUP BUTTERCUP! YOUR BLEEDING ANUS IS CALLING ME!!!" Remember when they both violently rapped your asshole at the sametime? Remember when they pulled out and gagged you with their large quantaties of sperm that they shot into your mouth? Remember when Ed Alonzo straddled your face and jerked off on it and said "Here's a little HIV juice for you...?" Remember when we all yelled "TIME FOR THE BIG FINALLY!!!" and then bent over and unleashed a torrent of diarrhea that was so biblical in proportion that it can only be appropriatly compaired to the flooding of New Orleans? Remember when Kurt stomped on your head causing you to black out? Remember when Maxwell wrapped you up in a rug and threw you in the back of Rocco's queermobile? Remember how Gay Zack took pictures of the whole thing so he can jerk off to them and send you the semen stained pictures? Remember when Rocco dumped you off in the wilderness? Remember when your head was starting to clear Ox came out of the bushess and kicked you straight in the zoinker? Remember when you were doubled over and he dropped his pants? Remember as you were gasping in pain he grabbed your jewfro and planted a nice fart bomb on your huge gonzo nose? Remember when he then wondered back into the bushed? Boy, you sure do have a rabid fanbase!!

Aug 13 2005, 12:14 PM
Hey Screech, remember when you finally got sick of people raping you and screaming racial slurs at you in the hallways? Remember when you finally had enough and you decided you were gonna do something about it? Remember how you hatched a crazy caper to break into Slaters house and steal some of his fathers guns? Remember how you finally flatened out all the kinks in the plan that you hatched and finally decided to go through with it? Remember how late one night you trespassed on Slater's real estate finally breaking into the kitchen window? Remember how you sneaked through the house and finally found the firearm you were looking for? Remember how you removed it from the gun cabinet and quickly hit the ricky-road? Remember the next day you came to school and Slater had a black eye? Remember how he told you that his dad saw that the Smith and Wesson was missing? Remember how he went on to tell you that his dad screamed "YOU BETTER FIND MY PISTOL! OR I'LL CRACK YOU IN THE HEAD WITH MY KARATE STICK!!!" Remember how Slater then said that he couldn't find his pistol and his dad did indeed crack him in the skull with a karate stick? Remember how Slater said he had no idea of who stole the gun and said he'd kick some ass if he found out who did it? Remember how the gang asked him if there were any clues? Remember how Slater mentioned he found a few small spots of shit next to the gun cabinet? Remember how Zack said "What kind of nigger bastard would do that to you?!" Remember how you did that "i'm not guilty whistling thing?" Remember how everyone noticed the gun sized bulge in you pants? Remember how everyone gave you a verbal assult and you paniced and drew the gun on them and squeezed off a few round at the gang but you missed all of them at point blank range because you're a fucking stupid jew? Remember how you took off running and you hid in an abandoned factory so nobody would find you? Remember how you started having dreams that Slater was gonna rape you again but this time go too far and do some serious damage? Remember how you woke up with the cold sweats and desided you were gonna kill Slater? Remember when you broke into his house again and you saw about 20 Slaters in the living room when you turned on the lights? Remember you got confused and didn't fire the gun? Remember how everyone pulled their wigs off and you saw that it was Zack, Belding, Tuttle, Jesse, Kelly, Lisa (how didn't you notice a black Slater?!), Mr. Testiverde, Mr. Dewey, Slater's dad, Sylvester, Maxwell Nerdstrom, your mom, hound dog (again how didn't you notice?!), Violet, Mancuso, Moose, Penny Belding, Ox, Edgar Poindexter, and Marvin Nedick? Remember when you in a confused shock and they bum rushed you and started to rape every hole you had? Remember how the girls squated on you and shitted and pissed on you? Remember how Kelly had a miscarage on your face? Remember how after an hour of extream gang rape you thought they were done and Slater decided to have his way with you? Remember how you screamed "THIS CAN'T BE FOR REAL!!!" and then Slater replied "THIS IS FOR REAL! ITS NO JOKE! I'M TELLING YOU THE TRUTH!!!" and then shot you up with his HIV+ sperm? Remember how they wrapped you up in a blanket and threw you in the bushes? Boy you sure got your comeuppins that day!!!!!

Jul 29 2005, 12:31 AM
Remember when people used to jerk off to you on television? Remember how "hip" and "exciting" you felt? Remember how now people jerk off on you in alleys? Remember how "filthy" and "degraded" you felt? Remember how happy you felt?

Jul 25 2005, 01:04 AM
Hey Screech, remember the time that Lisa got her dad's credit card for her good grades? Remember how she spent beyond her means and she couldn't afford to pay her bill? Remember how scared she was of her father? Remember how you and the gang said that you'd help her out because "thats what friends are for?" Remember how after a few days of raising some dough Zach and Slater approched you on a scheme that would get Lisa off the hook for good? Remember how they led you to Belding's office claiming that Belding had an excelent idea to save Lisa's hide? Remember when you walked into the office and Slater locked the door behind you and you didn't really think anything of it? Remember how Zack said "here he is sir! Prime for the pickin!" and it still didn't add up? Remember how Belding said in a low sleazy voice "goooooooood...." and stood up and unbuttoned his pants? Remember how just when things started to add up Slater cracked you over the head with Belding's Principal of the Year award? Remember how you fell to the floor? Remember how you scrambled to get to the door and to the hallway? Remember how as you started crawling Zack kicked you in the stomach? Remember how Zack and Slater grabbed you and pinned you to the floor? Remember when Mr. Belding ripped off your Zubaz and said "this'll be worth ever fucking cent! NOW TAKE YOU JEWISH FAGGOT!!!!" Remember how Mr. Belding jammed his middle aged wrinkled hard cock in your unlubbed ass? Remember how Zack and Slater chuckled and giggled as Belding rapped your torn up bleeding asshole? Remember how you screamed in pain? Remember how after about ten minutes of Belding pummeling your ass he pulled out and shoved his fist in your rectum? Remember how Belding said "Slater my boy, why don't you have a little fun?" Remember how Slater let go of you and Zack knelt on your shoulders and started to jack off on your face? Remember how Slater pulled down his acid washed jeans and stuck his Mexican man beef burrito in you bleeding ass? Remember how he fucked you and then shot his load in your ass? Remember how Zack finally came and blew his spooge on your face? Remember when Belding said "alright you two. I think you've had enough. He's all mine!" Remember when Belding got in the 69 position on top of you and grunted a turd out onto your face? Remember when he said that he's still got some "school spirit" in him? Remember when his teeth latched onto your cock and he shot out a stream of school caffeteria food shit all over your face? Remember when he turned around and finally came on your face and then rubbed him and Zacks fluids all over your face? Remember when he finallly stood up and said "it wasn't worth it" and kicked you in the stomach? Remember how Zack and Slater finally convinced Belding to keep you for his pleasure for a few days? Remember how Belding finally gave Zack and Slater the money needed for Lisa's credit card? Remember Belding told you that Jew's were only good at making money and then grabbed your fro and farted in your face? Remember when he tossed you under his desk and left you there while he cleaned up in the bathroom? Remember how you felt under there all shitted up and jizzed to oblivion? Boy that Bayside gang sure has some crazy schemes!

Jul 23 2005, 10:21 PM
Hey Dustin? Remember on E! True Hollywood Story: Saved by the Bell, how the interviewer made you cry like a stupid fucking jew when he mentioned the time you were raped during the filming of Saved by the Bell Hawaiian Style? Remember how he mentioned how you went into a Denny's bathroom? Remember how a man came out of the bathroom stall next to you and approched you? Remember how you felt "nervous" and "uneasy" when he stood behind you looking over your shoulder watching you piss out of your tiny cock? Remember how you said "excuse me?" to the man? Remember how you grabbed you by your greasy jew fro and smashed your face into the urinal? Remember how you fell on the floor crying like a bitch still pissing? Remember how you felt when you were covered in your own piss and blood? Remember how you felt when you saw that it was actually Dennis Haskins that had did this too you? Remember how he whistled for Mario Lopez to come out of the other stall? Remember how Dennis Haskins stepped on your face so Mario Lopez could jerk off his spicy latin cock to the sound of you screaming? Remember how he unloaded his cum in your bleeding head wound? Remember how Dennis yelled "my turn!" and pulled his pants down and jammed his unlubed cock in your ass? Remember how you bled as he pumped your ass with his massive principal cock? Remember how you screamed in pain and Mario Lopez kicked your teeth out and yelled "SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU STUPID JEW! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!" Remember how Mario then fucked your toothless bleeding mouth while Dennis was still getting it on with your now torn asshole? Remember how Dennis pulled your arms back really hard and it made you scream while he shot his load in your bleeding ass? Remember how he said "how's a little HIV juice for you Screech?" Remember how he pulled out and squated over you? Remember how Dennis then sprayed his shit all over you? Remember how Mario came in your mouth and you gagged on his cum and threw up on the floor? Remember how Mario rubbed your face in the vomit? Remember how he turned you over on your back and shat on your face? Remember how he rubbed the shit in your hair and face and kick you in the mouth again? Remember how Dennis said "I'm sorry, let me clean you off?" Remember how Dennis Haskins then pissed all over you and Mario did the same? Remember how they kept kicking you in the head until you passed and then hog tied you with your own clothes? Remember how they then threw you in a bathroom stall naked and covered in their HIV infected bodily fluids and left you there for dead? Remember how you came too and saw Mark-Paul Gosselaar standing there? Remember how relieved you felt that he came to your rescue? Remember the horror you felt when whipped out his cock and finished you off? Remember how he carved his initials into your queer hairless boy chest so that you'd always be reminded of who did this too you? Remember how Dennis and Mario came from behind him with polaroid camera? Remember how they then carved their names in your chest? Remember how the then took a bunch of pictures of you laying there so they could jerk off to them later on? Remember how the only clear thought you had was how violated you felt? Remember how the feeling of violation made you erect and turned on? Remember how the then saw your tiny erect penis and then kicked you straight in the junk for being a jewish homo? Man, they really grilled you for the details in that interview!!

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